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Joke of the Week

Black Country Joke of the Week on the Black Country Bugle.

  • Bound over

    Aynuk's missus was in court charged with assaulting her neighbour and biting off a piece of her ear. The magistrate said, "You are bound over to keep the...

  • Ayli's wife's wooden leg

    "Wot yo get yer missus fer Chrismus?" asked Aynuk. "I got 'er a wooden leg," replied Ayli. "Was that 'er main present?" "Nah,...

  • Granddad's medal

    "My granddad was in the Fust World War and he got a medal for single-handedly destroying the German lines of communication," said Aynuk "Cor,...

  • Christmas presents

    Aynuk and Ayli were discussing the Christmas presents they had given their wives. "I got me missus a diamond ring," said Aynuk. "I though yoh sed...

  • Fryin' pon

    "I bought me missus a non-stick fryin' pon," said Aynuk. "Is it any good?" asked Ayli. "I doh know, she ay used it yet - she cor get...

  • The stolen credit card

    "The wife's credit card's bin stolen," said Aynuk to his pal as they were supping a lunchtime pint. "'Ave yoh reported it to the police?"...

  • Ayli's accident

    Aynuk went to see Ayli in hospital and found him covered from head to toe in bandages, with just two tiny slits for his eyes. "Yoh bin in the wars, ay yoh,...

  • Sleepin' on the job

    Aynuk and Ayli got a job laying pipes. One day, after eating his snap, Aynuk lay down for a snooze, using a drainpipe as a pillow. He shifted about, unable to...

  • On a bicycle built for two

    Aynuk and Ayli were riding on a tandem bicycle. "It's damned hard peddlin' up this 'ill!" declared Aynuk "Ar, it's a steep, orlright,"...

  • Aynuk's money

    "My missus is always askin' me for money," said Aynuk. "Mornin', noon an' night, she never stops." "Cow me," said Ayli, "what...

  • Aynuk goos ter the doctor's

    Aynuk went to the doctor's and said, "Doctor, I cor keep me 'onds from shaerkin'." The doctor asked "Do you drink much?" "That's the...

  • Ayli in 'Ospital

    "Ah doe think mah missus is too fond o' me y'know," said Ayli from his hospital bed. "Ow d'yer mean?" asked Aynuk, pinching one of his...

  • Aynuk and Ayli go fishing

    Aynuk and Ayli were fishing in the cut when they saw a funeral procession pass over the bridge. Aynuk stood up and solemnly held his cap to his chest until the...

  • Ayli's new job

    "Ow do aer kid," said Aynuk, "'Ave yow got yerself a job yet?" "Ar, I'm a corsetiere." replied Ayli "A corsetiere? That's a...

  • Aynuk's earole

    "Wan yer dun ter yer earole mate?" asked Ayli, noticing a big red burn on the side of Aynuk's head. "Yoh bloody did that!" Aynuk hissed. &qu...

  • Aynuk's winders

    Aynuk invited Ayli round to see his new house in the posh bit of Upper Gornal. 'Wan yer think?' Aynuk asked. Ayli looked unsure. 'Ah doe like them winders,'...

  • Aynuk the artist

    Anyuk was a dab hand at painting and one day a lady asked him if he would paint her in the nude. "If yo like," he said, "but I'll keep me socks...

  • A useful husband

    Ayli was talking to his recently widowed sister. "Why yoh put yer 'usband's ashes in an egg timer?" he asked. She replied, "Well, 'e day do any...

  • Aynuk's wife

    "My wife's an angel," said Aynuk. "Yo was always lucky," said Ayli, "my missus ay even jed!"

  • Gooin' Underground

    Aynuk and Ayli went to London to see their team in the cup final (this is going back a bit). After the match the pair got well and truly blethered. Staggering...